9 May 1968

This being veterans day, the nation pauses, if only briefly, to salute the men and women that have sacrificed their time and for many, their lives, to ensure that each us can continue the lifestyle that we relish. Veterans day is so oddly placed between Halloween and Thanksgiving with Christmas looming in the back of our minds, meaning that unfortunately it is not given the respect it is properly due.

In the "build up" towards Veterans Day, the History Channel is running the program "Vietnam in HD" I have found the documentary to at least provide a good overview on a war that I unfortunately know little about. However the impact of the war still echos in part of my bloodline. My uncle Ron, a man, that my cousins and I never knew, was killed on the 9th of May in 1968, five days prior to his 21st birthday. I know very little of the man that was one of my mom's five siblings. My other aunts and uncles all remain in Michigan and the family was and remains quite close.

In watching the documentary I'm beginning to have a better understanding of the conflict, it's deficiency's and the measure in which our troops were considered successful in battle. I also discovered that the month of May in 1968 was the single bloodiest month in the entire war as 2,371 American Soldiers were killed. My uncle is merely a statistic or tally mark for many historians. His death did not impact the outcome of the war, yet it would impact a family and community for years to come.

I have often considered proposing to write a book that centers on my uncle, mike 3/5 and the lasting impact of Vietnam, death, and memories on a family. If I weren't hindered by inadequate abilities to write, I would have already made the attempt. At any rate, the book is in my head, the events, all of which started more than 15 years prior to my birth are difficult to understand. Of course there are gaps of knowledge, opinions and information surrounding my uncle but I still feel that it would be a book that many in this country could relate to. Although I must admit a book of the nature would most certainly open wounds in my family that are currently covered by the scars of the memories that were.

In the late 1990's a family friend stumbled upon a website dedicated to Uncle Ron's memory. I remember it being a tense several days in our family. Discovering the websites author, agenda and purpose was easy but also uncomfortable. I say that the events of my Uncles participation in the war is confusing, and difficult to understand because of circumstance. It is my understanding that he was married at nineteen and although he had gainful employment he joined up. He didn't wait for a draft notice, he joined. I'll never be able to grasp that. He not only joined, but became a US Marine. Surely he knew that when he put his name on the dotted line that he was on a one way collision course for Vietnam. Why would someone do this?

Many tore up their draft notices, some fled the country, thousands protested. But one individual from a tiny town decided the go against the grain. Surely, he wasn't the only one, why aren't these men discussed?

I have often tried to understand the emotions of my grandparents when they first learned that he had signed up for the marines. Knowing my grandfather I'm sure he was proud, yet abrasive. My grandmother was probably quiet yet perhaps gave her eldest a hug and the best look of assurance that she could. I doubt tears came publicly. For Grandma they were subdued, she's to tough to display anything but confidence and stability. She remains that way to this day.

All of these and many more partial stories and events have perked my curiosity of my uncles life and ultimate death. At a young age I was told very little about my uncle, except that he was a hero. I remember having a childhood friend at my grandparents and taking him to the wall where the high school graduation pictures of my mom and her siblings hang. The only thing I knew of my uncle was that he was a hero, and that's how I described him, a hero. I just didn't understand why at that point, just that he was a hero, like superman or batman, a hero.

Perhaps writing even this blog will cause a stir in my family, perhaps even anger some. It's a topic that although isn't to far below the surface, is left below the surface. Even today, I can tell you where some of Uncle Ron's letters and things are in my grandparents house, however I can also tell you that I wouldn't dare get the letters out for fear of poking the scars that have yet to heal in the family.